How to Survive the “Terrible Threes”: What to Expect and Tips

Gaining independence is an important part of a child’s growth. When they’re babies, problems are solved by crying aloud and hoping for mom or dad to come—but as they get older, children start to gain confidence in their problem-solving abilities, too. This will lay the groundwork for what they’ll later foster studying at a top rated preschool in Boynton Beach, FL.  

Nevertheless, for parents, this independence-gaining era comes with a streak of misbehavior, boundary testing, and rapid growth and change. For that reason, this age is commonly known as the “terrible threes.” We developed these tips to help you navigate these times and leave your relationship with your child stronger.  

So, What Are the “Terrible Threes”?

Terrible 3s, also known as the “terrible twos and threes,” is a common phrase used by parents to describe the challenging behavior of their toddlers.  

Children learn by interacting with their environment. Between the ages of two and three, kids start to gain finer motor skills and more control of their bodies, translating into new and unique experiences with the world around them. At the same time, each challenge increases their self-confidence—to the point where they’ll want to measure it with you, too.  

It is common for children to learn to assert their independence during this developmental stage. During the “terrible threes,” parents may experience a range of behavioral challenges, including tantrums, defiance, aggression, and separation anxiety. 

Tip 1: Understanding Your Child’s Struggles

Big changes are not easy for anyone, and for children who aren’t attuned to managing their own emotions yet, the challenges of the “terrible threes” can be especially overwhelming.  

While dealing with your child’s tantrums after a long day of work may feel overwhelming, it’s important to understand that they’re overcoming significant emotional changes, too. They might struggle to control their emotions and become more easily irritated or frustrated. 

Crying and other intense emotional outbursts are common, too. During these times, caregivers should maintain composure and patience because responding angrily or frustratedly can worsen things. 

Remember that tantrums are a reaction to something upsetting. When it comes to asking for what they want or talking, your child won’t react like an adult would. They scream or cry instead. So, take a deep breath, try to identify the root of their discomfort, and work alongside them to find a solution. That’s the only way to “unteach” them to throw tantrums in the face of trouble. 

Tip 2: Get Down to Their Level

Listening to your child’s first word is a magical moment. Slowly, they’ll gain more confidence, learn more words, and give you some good laughs whenever they mispronounce a word. As they turn three, these funny words may become repetitive: “¡No!” every time you ask them to brush their teeth or tidy up their room. 

For your child, exploring their autonomy means realizing they’re their own little human beings, too, and finding out they can make decisions for themselves—even if these aren’t always so good. So, talking to them eye-to-eye can be more effective in guiding their decision-making a little bit. 

When your child is upset, get down on their level by kneeling or sitting down if you can. They will feel heard and respected when you communicate with them on their level. While it may not fully resolve the issue, it will help de-escalate it. 

Tip 3: Manage When to Give In—And When Not To

When your child is throwing a tantrum, giving in may feel like the easiest choice—after all, just one more cookie won’t hurt, right? However, this attitude will teach your child that they can get what they want if they scream, cry, and have tantrums. 

When the child arrives at school or interacts with other kids, they will be shocked to learn that they are not getting what they want. This may lead to more difficulties, including disputes with teachers and other kids. So, try to be firm with your no’s—especially if they aren’t asking nicely. 

That doesn’t mean, though, that you can never accept. If you find it frustrating that your toddler refuses to go to bed on time every night, imagine how they feel hearing your no’s several times. A three-year-old views a day as lengthy, important, and full of opportunities to develop, run, and experience everything. So, be more open, make little concessions, and spend a lot of time with your child! 

Tip 4: Deescalate Situations in Public

Many parents become anxious when their child exhibits disruptive behavior in public. We all have felt embarrassed by a sudden tantrum in a public place, fearing that we’re disturbing those around us.  

However, to de-escalate these situations, it’s important to stop worrying about what others may think. 

Just concentrate on yourself, your child, and the circumstances. Make sure your child is in a safe space (where they can’t hurt themselves, you, or others) in the situation, and then you can get down to solving the challenge with your child. 

Tip 5: Redirect Your Child Elsewhere

Children’s misbehavior isn’t only directed at their parents or teachers—it’s also directed at friends. Children may be domineering, steal toys, hit, and behave badly toward their schoolmates. This behavior is unacceptable, though. Don’t brush it off; instead, try to redirect your child’s aggression and teach them to play in peace. 

If your child is pushing a lot while playing with their friends, have them apologize to their friend and move on to another game. That way, they’ll learn they won’t be able to keep playing if they act rough during the game. Sending them to a different game allows them to relax and understand that they cannot try to overpower others. 

Learn Effective Tips From a Top Rated Preschool in Boynton Beach, FL

Turning three years old is a period of fast physical and emotional changes for your child, which may result in issues. Nevertheless, it’s important to remember that the so-called “terrible threes” are simply a challenging age and not a reflection of your parenting skills.  

By working hard to understand their emotions, developing routines that reduce tantrums, and looking for ways to communicate more effectively, you’ll feel better equipped to navigate troubling times. And, if you need help, the professional team at Neighborhood Kids is here to take the baton. 

Contact us today and learn what our top rated preschool can do for you and your child!